As I’ve mentioned before, people read my books and assume that I’ve done the many, if not all, of the things in them. People have accused me of theft and adultery to name just two, although no one thinks I’ve killed—so it’s not all bad news.
However, in the last year or so, I’ve read some very odd things about me, some of which I have no idea why people thought they were true. So, I thought it was time I cleared the air. Here are ten things about me that I hope will set the record straight.
1. I’ve never seen a Rocky film.
2. I’ve never spent a night in jail.
3. I’m not in witness protection (not that I could admit it anyway).
4. I’m not the voice of the Geico gecko.
5. I can’t whistle.
6. I don’t wait in lines. It drives me crazy.
7. I’ve never been to a strip club.
8. I don’t like having my photo taken.
9. I don’t like compliments.
10. And, oh yeah, I’ve never punched a Panda.
I hope that clears up any misconceptions.
Alyx Morgan
I’m with ya on the Rocky films, Simon, but I would SWEAR that’s you voicing the cute little gecko. ;o)
It would be funny to hear why people believe those things about you.
Simon Wood
Alyx: I wish I had the gecko gig. That’s just bank.
No, these things aren’t the things people have thought. They were somewhat meaner comments about my books, my writing credits and whether they were real or not.
Kathy Delaney
Mean comments by pandas – go ahead, punch ’em!
Simon Wood
I have to take the higher ground, Kathy. 🙂
Simon Wood
I have now scene a Rocky film. I’m ashamed.