Simon Wood

HUMP DAY: Peevish!

Maybe it’s because it’s Guy Fawkes Day that I’m in peevish and rambunctious kind of mood at the moment.  I could be quite Zen about it all and let go of my irritation, but I don’t want to.  Sometimes bottling these things up and tossing them overboard isn’t enough.  Sometimes, you just have to rant.  So here are a few of my pet peeves:
1.      The pronunciation of caramel. It is pronounced cara-mel, not car-mall.  A car mall is where I go to buy a vehicle, not to enjoy a delicious confection.
2.      People who jaywalk when there’s a crosswalk ten yards away.  That is a capital crime in my book.  Executions should be held on the spot.
3.      Bacon!  WTF!!  I don’t get why people go overboard about bacon.  It’s nice but it’s not nirvana.
4.      Blockbuster movies splitting themselves into two parts or three in the case of The Hobbit.  This is a pretty thinly veiled attempt to squeeze and extra ten bucks out of everyone.  Hollywood, you’re not fooling us.
5.      While we’re on the topic movies, I don’t like PG-13 movies.  PG-13 has been the bane of movie going for the last 20yrs.  As the go-to classification to pull in as many punters as possible, it’s been excuse to dumb down thriller, action and horror movies. There’s nothing wrong with the classification per se, but filmmakers instead of playing up to the restrictions and played down to it.  If you want a lesson on working a classification to its hilt and still making a good movie, go watch the 1978 version of Invasion of the Body Snatchers.  Still creepy after 35yrs and it was only a PG.
6.      Enough with people putting pranks on YouTube.  Prank shows lost their appeal in the 80’s.  Maybe these things will end when a prankster gets killed in the street when they stage a fake crime.
7.      Can we stop calling things ‘hacks’ for doing mundane things?  Telling me how to open a can differently or that sticking one foot out of a bed to help me stay cool isn’t a life altering or radical way of doing something.  It’s not even interesting.
8.      People getting excited over the latest cell phone or tablet.  I have no idea why people went mental over the iPhone 6 release.  It’s a cell phone, albeit slightly different to its previous incarnation.  It wasn’t the cure for cancer.  Let’s keep it in perspective.
9.      Finally, my number one pet peeve is the Uber car sharing service.  It’s a glorified gypsy cab service with a phone ‘app.’  If it weren’t for the phone app feature, it would be spurned by every city in the country, but instead, it’s a multi-billion dollar company.  I’m waiting for everyone to catch up to my way of thinking.
Oh wow!  Boy, do I feel better.  The power of venting is very cathartic.  You should try it.  If you have any pet peeves, feel free to let them loose here.

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